Every month, we celebrate an Achiever who has shown growth, perseverance, and dedication to their goals. This month, we spotlight Sebastian*, a 9-year-old builder and strategist who spent this past year learning to say what he needs out loud.

Hand a room full of Achievers a pile of straws, a box of paperclips, and a roll of tape, then ask them to build a bridge strong enough to hold weight. Sebastian got right to work. He listened closely to the instructions, then decided a few things would work better his own way. When the weights went on, his bridge held more than anyone else's in the room. Mentors included.

Sebastian was proud of himself, and he soaked up the support of everyone around him.

"It was a great opportunity to positively reinforce how smart, creative, and capable he is." — Kenny, Friend (professional mentor)

Kenny is not overselling the creative part. Sebastian loves making art and sees possibility in shapes and colors. He has a sharp eye for space and reads patterns fast. He is also brave about trying new things, which is how a nine-year-old ends up out-engineering a room of adults.

He has been part of Friends of the Children–Boston for three years, and he heads into 4th grade this fall. The bridge was a great day. But the bigger work of his year came down to a much smaller word: no.

Sebastian is the classmate everyone wants to play with. He is kind and easygoing, he finds the funny side of almost any situation, and he makes friends quickly. Being that person also means being pulled in several directions at once, and his own preferences are usually the ones that get set aside.

So this year, with his Friend, Kenny, he started practicing. He says no now when a peer does or says something that makes him uncomfortable. He sets clearer boundaries at school. And when he and Kenny are planning an outing, he speaks up about what he actually wants to do.

Kenny built the conditions for it. He has prioritized one-to-one outings so that Sebastian has a space that belongs entirely to him. They talk through the frustrating parts. They have worked on telling the difference between the people Sebastian counts as friends and the people who simply count him as one.

"I try to provide him with a space where he can express his emotions and opinions freely and receive encouragement on how to act on them to move towards the social life he would like." — Kenny

That shift comes from a growing sense of Belonging, one of our nine Core Assets. Sebastian has figured out that he does not have to say yes to everyone in order to be accepted. He trusts the people around him to value what he needs, and to value his easygoing nature without taking advantage of it.

Speaking up opened something else, too. Board games began as a side activity, something Sebastian and Kenny played to be nearby and support another Achiever during karate class. Now that Sebastian has a say in how their outings go, he asks for board games nearly every time. Kenny calls it Sebastian finding a new Spark, another of the Core Assets.

"My favorite thing to do with Kenny is play board games. My favorite board games are battleship and Pokemon Labyrinth."

He also learned chess this year. In his words, "I was even able to beat a mentor."

That curiosity shows up away from the game board as well. Sebastian loves animals and the natural world. On a class field trip to a park, he wasn't in the mood to run around with everyone else, so Kenny asked if he wanted to look for different kinds of tree leaves instead. He said yes immediately. The two of them, along with another of Kenny's Achievers who also wanted a quieter option, collected about ten different types. Two weeks later, Sebastian met Kenny for an outing and right away told him about a new leaf he had found outside our location.

"One time I was feeling bored on a field trip and Kenny looked for leaves in the park with me which made me feel happy."

When we asked what makes him laugh, he brought up a storytelling activity he and Kenny made together with pictures. One picture in particular: a bear riding its bicycle home.

Someday, Sebastian wants to be a YouTuber who streams video games, especially the spooky ones. "I have fun when I get scared," he said.

When we asked what he would want people to know about him, he answered without hesitation: he is cool, and he has a lot of friends he likes spending time with and talking to. Three years in, both are true, and he is getting better at making sure the people around him hear it from him directly.

Learning to say no at nine is how an Achiever grows into someone who can speak up for himself at fourteen, when the stakes are higher and the rooms are bigger. Sebastian is getting that practice now, with a Friend beside him who will still be there when he needs it. 12+ years, no matter what.

Your support makes relationships like Sebastian and Kenny's possible for more Achievers across Boston.

*Name changed to protect privacy.